Dream Angel ( F P C D )
at 2009-03-10
Firing with bullets made of roses
Launching rockets full of kisses
Dropping missiles, blasting love
You have taken me to a place high above
^^ Once I started to read these word, I began to smile so bright, Azzza!
Ha ha, yes love can be so magical and so overwhelming. I love how you poured it all into such a unique poem:)
*hugs*
5/5 Ingrid
Valedico ( F P C D )
at 2009-03-10
You did well here, you used a neat lexical set and weaved your ideas together with ease. I liked the comparison with the war zone, two opposing ideas worked, in my opinion. I liked the title too, it was creative. Good work..
Katie ( F P C D )
at 2009-03-10
The title pulled me in, and the poem lived up to it. Amazing job. I love the rhyme scheme. Great work, and thanks for the comment. :)
Chelsey ( F C D )
at 2009-03-10
This poem is amazing. definitely three weeks well spent.
you did a good job.
i'd have to say my favorite stanza would be
"Triggering me to pour out my confessions
Those three words, aimed at your direction
Targeted towards your classified location
Detonating silence, combusting all my emotions"
the last one - it definitely was a wonderful ending to a wonderful poem.
nice job.
Michael D Nalley ( F P C D )
at 2009-03-10
I have not thought of the romantic passion that this poem reflects in light of a Detonating Silence
I like the way it is written
6>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>
Samantha ( F P C )
at 2009-03-10
Aww this is another great poem of yours. i love the rhyming and just the way you made it all come out.
a really romantic and well expressed poem.
great job
5/5
cowgirlstar26 ( F P C D )
at 2009-03-10
Showing me heaven in a battle field
Tranquil whisper in war proves surreal
Paradise within the jungle no more concealed
Love once tangled by vines has now been revealed
fav lines
omg i love it! your vocab rocks!!!!
5.5
umbra ( C )
at 2009-03-11
Haha! Metaphorpalooza!! I absolutely loved it! What is even more delicous is that the whole poem compares love to war. How very apt in my opinion. 5/5.
FlawlesslyTarnished ( F P C D )
at 2009-03-11
This piece was very well written. And a great read. The descriptions were greeat and the flow was almost flawless! :] The only thing that I dont really like that some lines and some didn't. But overall, it was an excellent piece. 5/5
HeavenOnEarth ( F P C D )
at 2009-03-11
A beautiful piece. I like the story it told and the wording you used. I can tell you spent a lot of time on this. Excellent write. Thanks for the comment. Means a lot = )
xDanikax
xxoxoxx
Italian Stallion ( F P C D )
at 2009-03-11
The emotion that lies within is so heartfelt. The imagery is fantastic, I can just picture all of this as I'm sure many others will too, since many can relate.
Overall great write, loved the flow and structure of this poem it was almost flawless. I think the flow would be flawless if you used punctuation within this poem. At the current moment you have no puncuation at all. In poetry, puncuation is very important. It lets the reader know when to pause or stop as well as making it flow better since the reader is reading it the way you truely intended the reader to read it.
The overall poem as a whole was outstanding, excellent write!!!
Peace, Joe
SilentSuicide ( P C D )
at 2009-03-11
Rtrayed this into a war type thing; yet without the violence per say. i enjoyed reading this. your word choice was very well put together and you didnt apper to stumble anywhere in your flow. 5/5
Rolo ( F P C D )
at 2009-03-11
I really enjoyed the description and word choice. I felt it was very powerful and full of emotion. Not just the normal kind of emotion you usually come across, something a bit deeper. And I think you were able to express this with your writing.
My only problem with this piece is that some lines rhymed, and some did not. I found that kind of threw me off...but other than that it was well done.
Thank you for reviewing my poem :]
5.
-Rolo
kate ( C D )
at 2009-03-12
This is very beautiful poem. To me it seemed like it explain itself of how hard it is just to travel to get someone to say those three words or how much "power" you go for that person to realize your in love with them =] i might be wrong about what you were thinking about but that's what I got out of it.
keep it up.
keep on writing.
love always and forever.
Cara ( F P C D )
at 2009-03-13
Sorry its taken me soooo long to comment this piece of art Azzza! What a wonderful write from you.
The title really made me curious, it was a fantastic title. It made me want to know what the poem was about and your piece didnt let me down.
A really creative write that said so much :]
Really well done Azzza.
5/5
Nema ( F P C D )
at 2009-03-13
First of all..I LOVE the title
The title is like the most important factor in the poem..first it grabs the reader's attention, second it hell sure strengthens the poem even more.
Concerning to your wording, there is simply no flaw in it, it was just amazing, very original yet intense.
I didn't know you're that good at love poems till I read you & sasha's collab.
Seriously you keep amazing me more =)
Awesome job Azzza.
Write on :]
Walter F Alvarado ( F P C D )
at 2009-03-15
This is a great poem with great selections of rhymes and it flows so well
Dixiedaisy ( F P C D )
at 2009-03-15
This poem brought to memory and older song. Love is a battlefield. I love the comparison between the wars and love. You have done an amazing job with this write. Thanks for the share.
Cindy ( F P C D )
at 2009-03-16
What a very unique poem of love . Great imagery and word choices.
Firing with bullets made of roses
Launching rockets full of kisses
Dropping missiles, blasting love
You have taken me to a place high above
It is like you are using all loves artiliary to get someones attention.
Showing me heaven in a battle field
Tranquil whisper in war proves surreal
Paradise within the jungle no more concealed
Love once tangled by vines has now been revealed
It seems the person has finally decided to come out in the open with their love no longer hiding it from others.
Emerging from clouds of smoke grenades
I seek shelter under your company's shade
Risking awkwardness as I step further ahead
Swearing upon my rifle, as I surrender to fate
The 2 loves coming together here. Falling into what was meant to be.
Triggering me to pour out my confessions
Those three words, aimed at your direction
Targeted towards your classified location
Detonating silence, combusting all my emotions
Unique end to a unique poem :)
Excellent job!
Take Care
Cindy
Ashurii Rayne ( F P C )
at 2009-03-25
Wow a fantastic piece! The most creative piece I've ever read in fact. I loved the emotions and how much you mixed it all up. The last stanza made the poem a perfect ending. I loved this poem, keep up the great work!! 5/5.
-Ashlei.
A POETRY COMMUNITY
POEMS