Just A Face No Need For A Name ( F P C D )
at 2009-03-28
This is very different. The style is original and works well with what you're trying to say. Your diction and syntax are also very strong. you have a great talent. keep it up. Shanik
T e m p s ( F P C D )
at 2009-03-29
This was a really good poem, I loved the usage of "I'd kill to..." and how that was repeated throughout the piece. Obviously we recognize here that you actually meant "I'd kill to..." to get the point across that you'd do anything to make this person love you basically. I think we all can relate to that feeling, youd basically almost die for this person.. you just want them to love you.
The ending was really strong, your rhyming.. flawless.. a really great poem. I think that you could have done a tad better.. but most of all it was a good poem. Why I say that is when we get that "urge" to just write a poem it tends to not come out the way we wish it did because we rush it.. I could tell that you weren't entirely pleased with this piece yourself, because you had the "urge"to just throw something on paper.
I enjoyed this though, the repetition helps with your flow and the rhyme scheme was consistant.
Good job (:
5/5.
[ Praised by : IdTakeABulletForYou ]
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