Ozzy N Vavy ( F P C D )
at 2009-11-08
Aww! Cris, that made me cry. i love you so much. *tears* that made me so happy. how can i rate something so sweet when there's only a 5....if it were up to me, i'd rate it as 1000. i love you cris!!
*Val
katie ( P C )
at 2009-11-08
She's a pretty lucky girl to have such a good friend in hand. But it seems to be that you guys are more then simply friends. Well done. 5/5
Ash ( F P C D )
at 2009-11-11
Well written. Short simple but at the same time still able to portray your feelings well through this poem.
Just a suggestion though to keep the flow going though this is my personal opinion...
"You never misunderstand..."
Maybe you could change it you "You always understand" - but this is just my own opinion and is not necessarily right.
Well done though. It was a good write. 5/5 from me.
Ray Smallshaw ( F P C D )
at 2009-11-11
This poem is good it is expressive and has a lot of feeling in it but to me it just misses that excellent mark as it does not stand out from a thousand other good poems on the same theme and in places it is not really good grammar or it does not sound or feel right.
1st. Stanza
You are my angel or have you already got one?
4th. Stanza
the last three lines don't ring true
L2 Now seeing you is unbelievable,
L3 Hearing your voice stuns me
L4 Holding you fills my dreams
Just suggestions?
All first draft poems should be fully edited never be content with what you have until it carries your message not your first thoughts.
4/5 Ray S
MERCY is never shown ( F P C D )
at 2009-11-18
Well i like your rhyme and pattern but i think this could be longer and say more i mean its really sweet but im sure you made your choice for a reason good job
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