Comments

Shattered Heart♥ ( F P C D ) at 2006-12-04

Awww =[ wow this is amazingly sad. made me cry. wonderful job on it 5/5

~Kristina

Italian Stallion ( F P C D ) at 2007-03-21

Wow, excellent write, I enjoyed it. The flow as well as the structure in this poem was outstanding. I loved your word choice and the Rhyming was good. Keep up the great work.

Peace, Joe

B Hawley ( F C D ) at 2007-03-28

Holy ......you know what. LOVED this one! The second part was the absolute most powerful, when you addressed them both. EXCELLENT!

""And here I am, blue tears are black
This bridge is burnt, no turning back""

One of my favorite parts......

""I must so that I can survive
I don't need you, to stay alive""

Another one

""And by the time you pay it back, I will be over you""

In this last POWEFUL line, I would simply modify the last few words to read.... "long over you" for flow reasons.

My goodness this was a great poem, with many different levels to it.

B.H. 5/5

Mountain Dew ( F P C D ) at 2007-04-13

The beginning of the poem was ok and then it got so much better as it went along

your an amazing writer (im sure you dont need me to tell you that, but it's the truth)

an adoring fan =P
brittany (MD)

Anonymous Angel ( F P C D ) at 2007-04-23

Hey,
excellent poem, i really love the second stanza, the rhyming is perfect as well as the flow 5/5
kisses stephanie

Startle Me ( F P C D ) at 2007-05-06

When I read the first line
I felt that it was kind of force.
I thought I had mistaken
But once I read the second line
I felt the same way.
But the third stanza
"You know I know"
It's beautiful.
So "poetic"
Lol.