Comments

SilverKiss ( F P C D ) at 2007-07-26

She waited, like velvet darkness

Trapped in a fistful of dreams

My favorite lines. A good poems, the question marks don't seem to fit, I don't exactly get their meaning.

Monica AKA Mika ( F P C D ) at 2007-07-26

I really like this poem a lot i love how you added nature in here, its beautiful really! keep up the good work...5/5

Hebe ( F P C ) at 2007-08-02

Good poem.
An enjoyable read.
Take care.

aDORKable x3 ( F P C D ) at 2007-08-03

A very well written poem. The word choice was excellent and the emotion that was portrayed in it was amazing! It should be a 5/5.
````````````````````
My favorite lines were:
She waited, like velvet darkness
Forsaken, desolate, insatiable
&&
They were one, because they were broken
They were broken because they were one,
``````````````
They expressed such emotion! The last two were my absolute favorite. :)

Great job! :)

Ciao

ReproducedByIntelligence ( F P C D ) at 2007-12-21

I loved how you would say " She waited for him" and such, then use decriptive words to back it up. It was just, amazing. (: I've done it a few times, but your much better at description than I am. (:

5/5

Katlynn ( C D ) at 2007-12-21

Wow this was a beautiful poem, i felt like it was happening, waiting for someone is a big thing honestly because you dont know whats going on on their part you know and it was told very deeply how she waiting honestly.

you did a good job.
keep up the good work.
keep on writing.
love always and forever.

Kaila ( F P C D ) at 2007-12-22

Wonderful expression indeed! I loved the second and third stanzas the most they had the most expressive vocabulary to me. I think that the flow was really good and you have written a nice piece of literature here wonderful job
5/5
kaila

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