sexyproudmommy ( F P C D )
at 2007-11-18
I liked this poem alot. very well written although the one stanza was kinda different from all the others...
"Pull yourself together," they declare, "Try to live past the pain."
"Someday you might see a light shining through the rain."
this one i think needs a little work.
great poem though
SlaveToTheMusic ( F P C D )
at 2007-11-18
I liked this poem alot, and i've read your poems before I know you have major talent. Sucks that you've been suffering from writers block to me it is a little obvious just because i've read alot of your work before. One thing I think you should try and do is expand on your rhyme. You have a perfect flow with it. I just think if you added some stronger and powerful words it would add more emotion. But that is just my personal opinion. Definitly a 5/5 though for this piece. It was great none the less. ~mel
FridusBlueheaven ( F P C D )
at 2007-11-18
I really love the title and your rhyme scheme. The emotion flowed very well and it's all well written. Great poem!!! 5/5 from me!!!
isabel ( F P C D )
at 2007-11-20
The poem is really nice...
i find it a bit long, though... it could be a little shorter to have a better rythm...(small suggestion...=D)
it is a poem filled with hope for better days...
but i still wonder...
isn't that just too easy to say?
and sometimes...impossible to do?
a great poem, anyway
5/5
*keep going*
isabel
AblissfulDREAMER ( F C D )
at 2008-01-18
Wow I could relate with everything you said here. I loved the style in which you decided to write, it was effective and meaningful. The flow was flawless and the rhymes did not seemed forced which was just great. Beautifully done. *5/5*
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