Comments - Picture in a Frame

вєαuτιful ιмρєяfєcτ ( F P C D ) at 2007-01-11

Your poems are so excellent. The rhyming flow was absoloutley(sp?) gorgeous, the rhyming was not forced, your words are very soothing, you are one of the best on this site, I applaud you for that.
excellent, excellent job.
5/5 for sure

Laura ( F P C D ) at 2007-01-11

No matter where the inspration came from you turned it into a lovely piece of writing. This poem almost let as tear escape my eye. It was sad yet satisfying at the same time to know thatthere is a love so true in this world that it remains with you until you have to part. The flow was undisturbed and the rhyming words used were original.
It was such a great read.


Kristy at 2007-01-11

I REALLY LIKE THIS POEM, GREAT! 5 POINTS


Clouds n ur Is at 2007-01-11

This was one of the best poems I've seen on this site. It made me think of my boyfriends son whom he lost 3 years ago. It made me think of how we feel when we look at his pictures. Great poem. I hope to read more from you.

Barry... ( F C ) at 2007-01-11

Beautiful poem....
must run in the family!!!!!!!!!!!!
Penny has dropped....
Debbylyn, cindy, john and someone is going to tell me the Queen of poetry Dawn Davies is related.....
How odd? You are a very talented lot
just had to look what you have written..
6/5...Happy new year!!!

Mimi ( F P C ) at 2007-01-12

This is just so beautiful and it has a great purpose and it's practically perfect. wonderfull job!

karl wild ( F P C D ) at 2007-01-12

Wow this poem is really amazing, there is so much passion and love right from the heart. No words can ever describe the pain of losing a loved one, but thats just life we have to move on and stay strong. Amazing poem and great flow i loved it 5/5

Brittney Schmelter ( F P C D ) at 2007-01-12

You are an amazing writer! So far what I have read its been sad .. but you are amazing. You make rhyming look so easy. I loved this part the best:

I try not to let the grief, just overcome my day,
I'll blow a kiss to heaven and send it when I pray.
I'll ask God to free me now, from a world so blue,
To take me up to Paradise, so I can fly with you.
I'm waiting for the day you come, calling out my name,
Until then I'll be staring at, your picture in a frame.

You did a great job! I hope you don't mind me adding you to my favorites.

Excellent Poem

5/5

Dilaura ( F P C D ) at 2007-01-12

Really impressive....!

Bryan ( F P C D ) at 2007-01-12

I think this one is a whole lot better than the one i made, love it, sorry bout your grandmother, this poem deserves a 5/5!!!, keep making them this good!!!

Kariena at 2007-01-13

I dont think you should have used GOD to blame because it really isnt his fault. but i must say this is a beautiful poem and im sorry this happened to you. i wish you the best.

Rachel Barnett ( F P C D ) at 2007-01-13

In response to Kariena. There are stages of grief which are different for each person. My response is lengthy so it will have to be posted as several seperate comments.

Rachel Barnett ( F P C D ) at 2007-01-13

In one way or another, we are all affected by death. Losses are inevitable and are ever present in all lives. Death is universal. Grief is universal.

We all must cope with bereavement at some stage in our lives. The finality of death brings to those left behind a tremendous amount of emotional pain. Grief is not something abnormal; rather, it is a normal and inevitable step in our journey through life.

Two simple definitions of grief are 1) the conflicting feelings caused by the end of or change in a familiar pattern or behavior. 2) a normal, natural and painful emotional reaction to loss.

We can grieve not only for the passing of a human life, but also for the death of a relationship (divorce) or we can suffer the same emotional reactions over the loss of a beloved pet. Grieving is difficult because it involved many intense feelings â love, sadness, fear, anger, relief, compassion, hate, or happiness to name a few. Not everyone experiences all of these feelings but many in the grieving process experience several of them at the same time. The feelings are intense, disorganizing and can be long lasting. Grieving often feels has been described as drowning in a sea of painful emotions.

There are certain stages of grief. 1) Shock â Immediately following the death of a loved one it is difficult to accept the loss. A feeling of unreality occurs. During those first days and through any religious rituals or memorials there is a feeling of being-out-of-touch. 2) Emotional Release â the awareness of just how dreadful the loss is accompanied by intense pangs of grief. In this stage a grieving individuals sleeps badly and weeps uncontrollably 3) Panic - For some time a grieving person can feel in the grip of mental instability. They can find themselves wandering around aimlessly, forgetting things, and not being able to finish what they started. Physical symptoms also can appear -- tightness in the throat, heaviness in the chest, an empty feeling in the stomach, tiredness and fatigue, headaches, migraine headaches, gastric and bowel upsets. 4) Guilt â At this stage an individual can begin to feel guilty about failures to do enough for the deceased, guilt over what happened or what didnât happen. 5) Hostility â Some individuals feel anger at what âcausedâ the loss of the loved one. (To some people this may be GOD but every person is different) 6) Inability to Resume Business-as-Usual Activities - the ability to concentrate on day-to-day activities may be severely limited. It is important to know and recognize that this is a normal phenomenon. A grieving personâs entire being â emotional, physical and spiritual, is focused on the loss that just occurred. Grief is a 100% experience. No one does it at 50%. 7) Reconciliation of Grief â balance in life returns little by little, much like healing from a severe physical wound. There are no set timeframes for healing. Each individual is different. 8) Hope - the sharp, ever present pain of grief will lessen and hope for a continued, yet different life emerges. Plans are made for the future and the individual is able to move forward in life with good feelings knowing they will always remember and have memories of the loved one.

In conclusion I would like to say that a person who has no poems posted on the site for me to fairly judge and does not understand the stages of grief and how they can be different for each individual has no business downrating my poem.






»тωіѕтє∂.яєαlity« ( F P C D ) at 2007-01-13

Wow. This is just...too inspirational. I really liked how you started this poem. It gave it depth from the start, and it held it's depth until the end.

I am sorry for your loss, for I know how it feels to lose someone close to you. If you need to talk, I be here. =)

Back to the poem. I thought you used really good rhymes, and the flow was really good in most places. I didn't think this poem needed many fixes at all. Just maybe one tiny one. XD Just a suggestion though:

[Or the radiating glow I'd feel, whenever {you would} grin.]
Suggestion: If I was writing this poem, I would replace {you would} with {you'd}. It just helps the flow better for that line, and it's easier to type. =P

Other than that, I didn't see many things wrong with it. =) Keep it up. 5/5 xoxo

Samantha

Italian Stallion ( F P C D ) at 2007-01-14

Wow, very nicely written. The flow was good as well as the structure. You have a lot of talent, keep up the wonderful work.

Peace, Joe

Nina at 2007-01-17

This is a realy good poem...u could become a famous person that writes poem's...i hope to be good as you one day but i'm only 13 so you never know...perfect 10

Minkus ( F P C D ) at 2007-01-17

Once again, excellent job--the rhymes were refreshing and the rhythm seemed flawless. Keep up the good work!

Nina at 2007-01-18

Thax...i'm realy falling in the footstep's of one of my realy good friend she died 12/27/06 she had cancer and she taught me how to write poem's...if it wasn't for her then i would still be doing"roses are red"poem's...lol

ben thompson ( F P C D ) at 2007-01-20

Flippin awesome brought a tear to my eye. great write

Daenerys Stormborn [The Sphinx] ( F P C D ) at 2007-01-22

The emotion in your poems is phenomenal. Another very tragic poem, filled with imagery, originality, and truth. You write from your heart, and that is a thing to behold. 5/5


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