Forever (Written in 4 letters and a conversation)

by Thomas

Dear Jessica,

I'm sorry this letter may not reach you in time
But I've had this idea for so long in my mind
You know how I attempted suicide at age thirteen
Well, ever since then my wrists have been clean
Lately though I've been falling back to the past
And I'm noticing that everything is falling apart fast
So I've decided that tonight I will take my life
With pills and a rope, not my formerly loved knife
So if you get this before I am gone and dead
Try to get some ideas through my head
That maybe the future is brighter than I see
And that maybe in time you could learn to love me
But this is the end, for now it would seem
You will never ever send a reply back to me
Goodnight to you the only girl I ever loved
I will watch over you when I arrive in heaven above.

Love, Joseph

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Dear Joseph,

It's been a week since you sent me this letter
You haven't gone yet, I know you so much better
Every time you say you'll do it, you always wait
For some reason you don't want to leave decisions to fate
But trust me; I love you more than you could know
I always tried to hide it; I never did want to show
But now that you're falling back to depression again
I should let you know, I want you as much more than a friend
If you leave this world, what am I supposed to do
I never did know another person nicer than you
And I promise you from now on, I can prove to you I care
Everywhere you go from here; by you're side I'll be there
So if you can forgive me for keeping secrets
I can help you to make your way through this
Everyone has hard times every now and then
But know you have me with you, forever and always your friend.

Love, Jessica

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Dear Jessica,

I never did leave when I said that I would
But now today, I am leaving this world for good
It's too late; your love means nothing to me now
I thought I could make it without you somehow
But my mind is made up, I have everything set
Not a thought on my mind of any regrets
So here I go, I'm sorry to say goodbye so soon
But at least now I never have to see another full moon
So I know by the time you start this your heart will be broken
I'm sorry because I never meant to tear anybody open
So you can learn to hate me, just like everyone else always has
And when you hear I am dead, I know then you will be glad
No one will bother to come see me at my funeral tomorrow
No one will bother to wallow away their time in sorrow
So here I go to take my life, one more sorry and goodbye
At least you don't have to worry about seeing me on the night I die

Shattered and Broken, Forever Alone, Joseph

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Dear The Only Boy I Loved,

I'm crying my eyes out, I can't even say your name
But never could I hate you, even when you've extinguished life's flame
I continue to think if I should follow in your footsteps
I know you'd tell me no, but life can not get better, I can never forget
How when you wanted my love, could it not be enough
In the end I guess that you never really wanted love
But sorrow has taken me under its wing and led me to think
Nothing could make me happy again, I stand on the brink
Life and death surround me in the way heaven and hell surround earth
And now so many memories flash through my head, to now from birth
I'm crying my eyes out; I can't even say your name
And in my mind I am screaming, "Go ahead, just do the same"
But you would not want me to follow you into the light
To do the same, just on a different night
But I'm sorry to betray you; I feel this is what I must do
To die today would let me be in heaven forever with you.

Love, Jessica

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(The next day, she enters her bedroom crying; teardrops have left little wet marks all over her red shirt and her cheeks glistened with the wet trails of rolling sorrow. She finds Joseph sitting on her bed, his body just a glowing mist and Jessica knows he is dead.)

Joseph: "Darling, I am sorry, I never meant to hurt you
But honestly what else could I do?"

Jessica: "You could have told me sooner, a while ago
When the feelings came back, you could have let me know
Now I see it's too late, I've failed you again
But now I can join you, forever in heaven my friend."

Joseph: "Promise me one thing now; you will not do the same
That you will live life out in the fullness of its game
And when you are old you can die as nature has planned
Then, and only then, you can join me in the Promised Land."

Jessica: "But Joseph, I need you so much, I just can't live
Without you here, what do I have left to give?"

Joseph: "I will watch over you, day in and day out
Live life to the fullest, make me so proud
Show me how stupid I truly have been
To have taken my life early and left you alone my friend."

Jessica: "Okay, I accept, I'll continue living for you
As a final request, it's the least that I could do
So, thank you for saving me, I wish I could have done the same
And now I know truly that inside you felt much pain."

(With her last word, Joseph fades into the air and leaves Jessica behind to live the rest of her life. Three weeks later she was hit by a drunk driver and killed. She joined Joseph in heaven, to eternally continue their friendship.)

 

Submission date : 2008-05-25
Last edit : 2008-06-18

Visits : 3738
Votes : 9
Rating : 5.0

Latest comments

SashaMirage ( F P C ) at 2008-11-26

This was exellent! I didn't take my eyes away from the screen from the beginning to the last word. You captured many forms of emotions in this and the rhyme and flow were perfect. Great story. 5/5

JabberingBlues at 2009-01-07

This is amazing. Very unusual format and the flow is great. Your words provoke very powerful emotions...contradictory, both sad and happy and i'm quite speechless! great write 5/5

LivingARealDream ( F C ) at 2009-01-13

Awww, really sad, just made me feel like crying.
Please keep writing, i enjoy your poems this is only one that i continue to like.

xoxo

Fallingawayfromu ( F P ) at 2009-01-28

This poem is amazing. I wanted to start crying while reading it. -Arielle

love drought melody ( F P C ) at 2009-03-03

Wow. powerful. beautifully written. im speachless.
--lovedroughtmelody



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