Submission date : 2012-06-04
Last edit : 2012-06-04
Dawn ( F )
I adore this, it was well said.
I got the feeling you wanted to portray, or at least what I think you meant, very quickly, and it's simply beautiful.
Lune de ma vie ( C D )
So simple yet so beautiful and deep.
"but I am always
left with the residue
of a romance that ended
before it began"
That was amazing, really deep and profound, in a way I can relate.
LOVE this.. "and as I strum my dreams
into a broken melody"
Such a deep metaphor and so much love and emotion within it, heartache and pain. Brought me to tears actually.
I found myself reading this one a few times before commenting on this, you really have a way with words.
Jenni ( F P C D )
Firstly, stop posting love poems to comment. I had to log back in three times then to be able to do so. Pft.
Secondly, can you believe I just had to look up the definition of cathartic, even after I have seen you use it before?!
I enjoyed this, I find most of the piece to be somewhat sad, yes. But I find how you state you have an epiphany inspiring. Sometimes, all we need is to stop focusing on the sad and to focus on what is really important in such circumstances to enable us to move forwards and on with our lives. You mentioning an epiphany makes me think that although you're upset that this romance has failed, you will refuse to brood on it and will move forward to bigger and better things, even if it is difficult to do so.
I really like the mentioning of strumming dreams-what unique wording! You manage to capture the powerfulness of music yet use it in such an original way which adds such power to this, instead of simply referencing music alone. Beautiful!
Ohhh how incredibly sad are your closing lines..they hit me with emotion hard. It's such a difficult thing to admit when we are not right for someone, and yet you manage to do so here whilst remaining somewhat positive (Back to your epiphany) and managing to captivate the reader into thinking -You may not have been meant to be, but you'll find someone worthy!
my thoughts, anyway. :)
[ Praised by Blissful | Approved by Sherry Lynn ]
Italian Stallion ( F P C D )
Bliss, your work makes me feel so many different emotions. Although I don't say this often to many people that write poetry, but this piece made me cry. Lovely write, keep up the wonderful work.
Acoustic Odyssey ( F C )
Beautifully penned. Sometimes the heart can get ahead of itself, and open the secret of it's beat to one who was never meant to decipher it. Simply Amazing.