Comments - Sweet Love's Deceit

*Charisma* ( F P C D ) at 2007-07-02

A very good poem! The scheme of it was very neat. Though I think in your first and last stanza you didn't follow that inward rhyme you had in the other stanza's. But I really enjoyed it and the question's asked. I imagine it was a little difficult to put this together!

SecludedSerendipity ( F P C D ) at 2007-07-02

This is definitely one of the best poems I've read in a while. The flow is absolutely flawless, and I like how you kept each stanza running along the same lines.

Beautiful work.

Marian ( F P C D ) at 2007-07-02

How terrific this piece is. It truly was written and presented rather well and sound. In such an eloquent manner, you've induced a refreshing sensation within me, which was rather cool. I'd give you additional props for doing a good job with the internal rhymes. It goes on circle. And I find nothing to complain at, as well. =] Nice job! 5/5 ~Marian

ImNotPerfect20 ( F C D ) at 2007-07-02

This was really good! I absolutly adored it. You are an awesome writer. This is my favorite part.
After all the tears you've cried, the broken pride,
Through all the times they've lied, the pain inside,
could you open your eyes, to your own surprise?
Or would you sever your ties, accept demise?

Very good job keep up the great work.. 5/5

NyellMoonlight ( F P C D ) at 2007-07-02

"After all the sleepless nights, countless fights,
Through all the bitter sights, wrongs and rights,
Could you open your mind, never look behind?
Or would you stay confined, accept declined?"- amazingly written stanza.
The poem is very deep, with great wording. I like it from the beginning to end, and I can relate to some parts of it.
Great job, 5/5

DarkSpirit ( F C D ) at 2007-07-03

Excellently expressed emotions through the whole poem, good topic and It's not a classical love poem, and that is great (I don't prefer love poetry). 5/5

The Angel of Secrets ( F P C D ) at 2007-07-03

Wow. This was such a good poem. The flow was perfect, the lanuage excellent and the content was great. I am very impressed (and im hard to impress). Excellent.

livin in a lonely hell ( F P C D ) at 2007-07-03

Great message and great flow and rhyme this is a real good piece and alot of ppl can relate keep it up


Ily Ms Perfectionist ( F P C D ) at 2007-07-03

Amazing work. The flow, the rhyming, and it's so true. All the questions are major ones, and you managed to fit them into a very nicely written poem.

.:*finally letting go*:. ( F ) at 2007-07-03

Your a great writer... this poem is written very well.. keep up the good work! <3

lisa ( F P C ) at 2007-07-03

Great poem!!!i loved all the questions asked in it,great choice of words 5/5

BrokenREALiTy ( F P C D ) at 2007-07-04

Definitely a great write . Says exactly what many need to hear these days . The flow was near flawless; a great choice of words; and all is so true . And I must applaud you for the rhymes within the lines, too . A truly wonderful piece .


Live WeLL ( F P C D ) at 2007-07-04

Wow this is really really amazing.. i LOVE the way it was written and the way you had so many rhyming words in each stanza.. you really do have a lot of talent.. i read this one a few times because i liked it so much lol.. and of course a lot of people can relate to this.. you asked really good questions in this... AWESOME job dudee lol.. keep it up =] 10/5

Goran Rahim ( F P C D ) at 2007-07-04

Wow, that was amazing, specially the flow and the rhyming, it was so great.
as always you have done a great job...

gIrL ( F P C D ) at 2007-07-04

I loce your poem
do job :)

Jenni Marie ( F P C D ) at 2007-07-04

This is awseome.
Beautiful powerful opening that pulled me right in, with it getting better and better from there.
beautiful imagery, it created very vivid pictures in my mind, and I loved the ending, I thought it was stunning and intense.

Sweet Fragility ( F C D ) at 2007-07-04

Wonderful job - my fav stanza was:
After all the broken hearts, we'll one day find,
Through all our questions, true love is blind,
Though a million things could knock us off our feet,
Always remain discreet, for sweet, love's deceit.

ur rhyming is well done so keep up the good work!

Rachel ( F P C D ) at 2007-07-05

Excellent job. True message that flowed flawlessly.

xkelsiex ( F C ) at 2007-07-05

This was an excellent poem.The rhyming was perfect.Well writen.

Michael D Nalley ( F P C D ) at 2007-07-05

Firstly the flow is flawless and the rhythm and rhyme is excellent. I can really relate to the theme you have chosen with the poetic questions. Also I can since the poem was written from an actual experience, because I believe that kind of emotional passion is hard to fake. Again I would not change a thing

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