Comments - Learning to Dance in the Rain.

Margaret Ruthfi Thomas at 2009-02-19

This is cooooollllll...
awesome choice of words..
although isnt that line "Suddenly you press your delicate lips upon mine" used in twiilight???

RayLeen ( F C D ) at 2009-03-16

I prefer rhyming poems, but this was absolutly beautiful :D i love it.
especially the last line, it really pulled the whole thing together, which can be hard to do.
congrats on the win, you deserve it :)

Marc Ortiz ( F P C D ) at 2009-04-09

Wow :| temps, you've really improve! I've first read your poems around 2006... You've improve over 300% since that time! :|

Your guiding steps direct me through the puddles,
as we dance seductively to the rhythm of the rain.
^ Beautiful words and imagery. In just 2 lines you've painted a clear dramatic picture in my mind. Awesome!

My ear placed perfectly on your heart listening to the beat,
as it sings to me those three words I love to hear.
^ Oh dear God. Amazing lines! No words to describe it.

I wish I also improve this much since I first wrote a poem :(

This poem is one of my favorite poems of all time! temps, keep writing! :)

Colby ( F P C D ) at 2009-05-26

Could anyone write a better poem? Honestly this is amazing...A twist of beautiful descriptive writing and incredible emotion living together in perfect harmony.

Prolife And Proud ( F P C D ) at 2009-06-11

I really can't believe I never commented on this piece! The title really dragged me in, and I can see this is going to be another fun poem to read!

"Droplets of rain fall down upon our bodies,
splashing randomly on the cold ground,
drenching our clothes as we dance close.
Your arms securely wrapped around my waist,
my hands gently placed upon your shoulders."

Awww....How cute is this! This creates such a pleasent picture in my mind, how I wish to be that girl.

"Your guiding steps direct me through the puddles,
as we dance seductively to the rhythm of the rain.
Your delicate fingers run through my coarse brown hair,
then cup my oval shaped face as you stare attentively
into my gorgeous blue eyes, yearning a passionate kiss."

Wow, this is making me speechless! The whole concept of you two dancing together in the rain is so sweet and innocent, it just portrays such love. Great descriptions here that help the reader get into this piece, I feel as if I am right by you both, watching you. I liked how you were talking about the rhythm of the rain, that is very unique, I never would have thought of that.

"Suddenly you press your delicate lips upon mine,
luring me in closer, keeping me warm within your arms.
My ear placed perfectly on your heart listening to the beat,
as it sings to me those three words I love to hear.
Embraced so tight, forever in your arms I will remain."

Love is a beautiful thing and you have portrayed so much passion and bliss, amazing detail that made me wish this would happen to me!

"The beautiful smell of love lingers throughout the air,"

I like how you say that, I have never heard of that said, again you are so creative and talented!

"as two lovers learn to dance in the everlasting rain."

Beautiful ending line. Man, I am so adding this to my favorites. I am so glad you won Temps, you are very worthy of it and I hope this poem becomes famous worldwide someday. You have stunned me with this masterpiece, flawless work!

5/5 from me, keep writing...


[ Praised by Rania Moallem | Approved by Ex-Moderator ]

bhaskaryya at 2009-08-28

Dull. dumb. cliched. preachy.

Emma Wallis ( F P C D ) at 2009-08-31

An amazing poem. 5/5 x

Always and Never ( F P C D ) at 2009-11-29

I have nothing to say except that this poem was so romantic and made me jealous, i wana feel like this! lol but this is a wonderfully written poem which i enjoyed reading. Great job

mossgirl19 ( P C ) at 2009-12-21

Its touching and i have to say really beautiful for deserves the highest rate.

PinkyPrincess ( F P C D ) at 2010-01-25

I'm surprised I haven't commented on this poem yet! I loooove it... so beautiful... You've expressed the sweetest moment anyone could ever share with someone! I felt all tingly and wished I could have experienced something so beautiful with someone. And well, there's just something about dancing in the rain! Love and passion are wonderful and your poem is amazing... It's no surprise you won, Congratulations!!

robert adrien flores ( F P C D ) at 2010-06-10

Awesome! i loved the emotion on this one

Brillant aka Sunshine ( F P C D ) at 2010-10-31

TEmpsi, I think I remember this poem..reminds me of the old club with Anna.

I love the entire poem, with it's coherence, word choice,wording and atmosphere.
The description was perfect, and the flow was even better. I was not surprised at all by the tightness and strength of your expression, cause that's something I always expect when reading your work ^_^; but was impressed sure by the ability you have in bringing for us readers that images crystal clear.

Was a nice , lovely view.
>>.your last 2 lines, been such a bomb ..I was too much diving within the happiness and positiveness of their impact!

5/5 SURE

Lizzie ( F P C D ) at 2011-02-01

Dancing in the rain like that with someone you lofe must be magestic

Kasy at 2011-06-16

Nice :)
Bet You Won The COntest huh ? "]
-Kasy <3<3 --

PoetryKnight ( F C ) at 2011-07-07

Wicked awsome poem, definatly caught my eye with the attention it got. and i have danced in the rain, i love the rain, especially a hard down pour. The smell, the feel, even the taste. well done with the description and out pour of the feelings in this poem. a 5/5 indeed, keep writting, and put out poems likes this, I'll keep reading.

From the PoetryKnight.

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